Abusive people have specific characteristics, some of them are listed below:
- A Victim
- Insincerely repentant
- Vicious and cruel
As a single mom, it is important that we know and are aware of what these abusive characteristics are when it comes to dating.
When dating, it is important that we keep these in mind as we seek someone to bring into our lives and the lives of our children. Please note that majority of these abusive characteristics are not of God, in fact many of them are the opposite.
Let’s go over a few
Charm: The Bible says in Proverbs 31:30 that “charm is deceptive…” meaning that a man who is trying to charm you, is also misleading you! Why get involved with a guy who is “charming”? Instead run from him! Cut him off quick! In most cases, his intentions are not good.
Jealousy: I was engaged to a guy who had all of the listed abusive characteristics and one thing that he was to a great extent was jealous! He was jealous of my job, of the relationship that I had with my child, of my education, and of my appearance. He did everything that he could to have “one-up’ one me and got angry when he couldn’t.
Controlling: Is he always wanting to drive you everywhere, even when you offer to drive? Is he always suggesting that you wear something different? Is he always trying to be hands on, even when you ask him to be more hands off? He’s trying to control your life and if he’s a man of God, he may even use scriptures in the Bible to do it! Be aware! Not even God forces himself on you. He is the greatest example of a gentlemen. He won’t act unless you allow him. The man that you are dating should be the same way.
The bottomline is that an abusive person will be one of the worst experiences that you could ever have in your lifetime. I pray that you would be alert and that you would do everything that you can to protect you and your child/ren because Mama, you deserve God’s best. God’s best won’t have any of these abusive qualities.